Blind Spot

We all have blind spots.  Areas of our life that we just can't see.  I have some that I know about, and I'm sure I have many that I don't know about.  For example, I am a child of neglect who turned to isolation, drugs, and pornography as a source of comfort.  This has left me largely blind to any positive effect I may have on other people.  When I get specific accolades and affirmation, it simply doesn't register with me... it doesn't match my preconceived view of myself, so I simply don't see it. 

The 1955 t-bird has a very nasty blind spot on the left rear quarter, at least when the soft top is up or the hardtop is on.  The windows are low.  A tall man has to duck to see out the side window, even with the seat all the way down.  The left outside mirror is flat and small, and has a very limited view.  The back edge of the window is adjacent to the driver's shoulder, and the B-pillar is so wide that it is impossible to see to the left rear when merging or changing lanes.  If I have a passenger, I task them to look behind when I want to merge.  When I'm alone, I have to lean forward and nearly stick my head out the window to look behind.  I haven't had any real close calls yet, but I am very careful.

Ford knew about this problem early on, and tried out several potential fixes.  The lines of the hardtop are pretty, and well proportioned.  The stylists didn't want to change them.  In an act of desperation, management insisted on an inexpensive window for the hard top that would improve rear quarter vision.  The result was the iconic porthole.

Yes, the "classic" porthole top wasn't some stylists dream, it was a quick and dirty response to owner complaints.  And it was a no-cost option for '56 and '57, never mandatory.  Most customers chose the portholes, because it did improve rear quarter vision.... marginally.  A soda-straw glimpse into the left lane before merging is far better than nothing.

I don't want to install a porthole in Nell's hardtop, but I need to do something about the blind spot if I want to safely drive the car with the top on.  I use a small blind spot mirror on my other cars, but that would look out of place on a '55 t-bird.  What do do?

The aftermarket industry offers small rear view mirrors that clamp to the door frames of 40's vintage Ford and Chevy trucks.  I bought one of these 3" "peep mirrors" for under $20, and tried to mount it to the inside window frame of the hard top.  Here's what I had in mind:

A special blind spot mirror to look into the left rear quarter.  Noticable, but not out of character in period chrome.

The blind spot mirror is attached to the top, so it isn't on the car when it's not needed.

Convex glass gives a reasonably wide field of view

I had hoped to simply clamp the mirror in place, and avoid drilling holes in the top.  After several futile attempts, I resorted to cutting the expensive window weatherstripping, and drilling two small holes in the top.  This would be heresy on a concours quality car, but that was never my intention with this car.  This is a safety issue.  Besides, the holes can be filled with a tiny bit of bondo if the mirror is removed later.

I modified the mirror base to accept the two button-head 10x32 screws, which go through holes in the metal weatherstrip backing and the fiberglass of the top.

I am gradually learning to see into my own emotional blind spot, but it is difficult.  I need to rely on the people I love to convince me that I have a positive influence on others, including them.  I need an emotional "blind spot mirror" before I can see myself clearly as most other people see me.  I need to learn to trust those I love in a new way.  I also need to trust God when he says that he delights in me.

Ps 18:16-19

Bird Songs

I have been puzzling about the radio.  I don't really listen to AM radio, and I don't care about having a stock working radio in the car.  I wouldn't listen to it.  Since this car is for driving, not for showing, any audio system in the car should be suitable for what I want to listen to.

I like having the gauges occupying the radio space in the dash.  For around $600, I could get a good "look alike" radio to fit in the dash that would have FM and aux inputs, but I don't want to spend the money and I don't want to give up that cool gauge panel.  Instead, I've pursued putting together a "headless" audio system that can play music from my iPod or one of my family's many iPhones.  The iPod Nano that I got for Christmas has a pretty good FM radio, so I really don't need a separate radio in the car.  Not only that, I deliberately removed the antenna and had the hole filled before the car was painted.

On the 200 mile trip to Uncle Toronado's house, my son wanted to play some music.  We listened to his iPhone though a clever little plastic horn that sounds reasonable indoors, but not on a noisy freeway.  This experience brought home the benefit of having some kind of audio system on long trips.  I decided that since everything else is almost done, it's time to raise the priority of having tunes in the car.

Placing and powering amplifiers in the car is easy, now that the car is 12V.  There is plenty of room under the dash. The tricky part is the speakers.  I can put a good high power  co-ax 6x9 speaker in the original hole in the dash, but stereo listening requires two additional speakers.  I decided to go for a 3-speaker setup (left, center/dash, and right).  9 months ago, I planned to cut holes in the footwells, and weld metal "architectural" speaker boxes into the inner fenders.  I even planned out how to use '56/'57 cowl vent grilles to disguise the speakers.   This idea was so attractive that I bought a set of good used speakers and metal speaker boxes.  When it came down to it, however, installing them looked like a lot more work than I had originally thought, and there were other things on the car that I'd rather work on.  The more I thought about cutting big holes in the footwells, the more uncomfortable I got with the idea.

Then I saw a motorcycle stereo system on sale at Amazon, which suddenly opened up a low-cost and relatively easy alternative.  The motorcycle speakers are small, but they come in their own attractive chromed enclosures which can easily be mounted under the dash, and maybe even swiveled out of sight when desired.  Overall, the system on sale had good reviews...  the fidelity is marginal, but a loud old t-bird is not a good environment for critical listening anyway.  I picked up the motorcycle system for $50, spent another $20 on a good used 6x9 coaxial Pioneer center speaker, and $45 for a center-channel (monoblock) amplifier.  I spent another $35 for two replacement knobs that match the other knobs on the dash.  Total investment is around $150.

It has taken a month or so of occasional evenings to work out the installation, but Nell now has a working audio system.  Last week I installed the speakers and wired up the entire system on the floor of the car, just to make sure everything would work together.  It's not a premium car stereo, but it seems to get reasonably loud.  My iPod can drive the stereo amp into overload, however, and it's not nearly as loud as the "600 watts" on the box would suggest.  I'm guessing it will play about 20 watts (RMS average) tops.  The monoblock amp for the center channel has a lot more muscle, but I keep it turned down to blend with the stereo speakers.  Overall, the system has a sweet midrange and not much else.

The 3" full-range speakers were designed to mount to motorcycle handlebars.  One bolt attaches them solidly to the footwell, and allows them to be positioned towards the driver.

The passenger side speaker is just as easy to install.

Today I installed the amplifiers under the dash, mounting them to a bar I made that connects to the original radio brackets. I didn't install a power switch, but simply connected the fused power leads to the "accessory" position on the ignition switch.  I figure it doesn't draw much power, and I can easily pull the fuse if I need to turn the system off.

Next, I adapted the remote volume control from the motorcycle stereo to fit in the position of one of the original radio knobs.  This was pretty challenging, involving a little fabrication and some tenacity shaping things to fit. 

 The volume knob is by the heater controls.  The knob on the other side is a pull switch, which will eventually control the fog lights.  I like the look, but I may invest in a couple of used chrome bezels to make the new knobs blend in better.

My son and I went for a test drive this afternoon.  The music is pretty clear, if not full and lush.  The center dash speaker provides all the bass and some of the highs, while the stereo speakers provide the midrange and stereo effect.  While not really hi-fi, it will make long trips more enjoyable.  And, when played at full volume (just short of overloading the motorcycle amp), it's just loud enough to be heard clearly on the freeway with the top off.  It will be plenty loud with the top on.

It's been a good day.   I think I needed some success and enjoyment from the car today.

Dad's health is slowly failing.  He still lives alone in a cluttered upstairs apartment, but he fell a week ago and had to call 911.  After consulting with the family, I talked his doctors into directing him that he can no longer live alone.  They also said that he can no longer drive.  My sister and I are taking him to visit potential assisted living places tomorrow.  My goal is to get him moved within a week.

I'm wrestling with what it means to honor my Father in this situation.

Restoration & Recycling

17 months ago, I encountered the noisome truth about this car's past.  I didn't want to deal with it, so I put it in the side yard and ignored it.

In the late summer heat, with the windows open, the odoriferous nature of my denial and procrastination came back to haunt me in my home.  My spouse promptly made it clear that this was unacceptable.  I had to do something, but I still wasn't ready to fully address the problem.  I had purchased a new replacement gas tank, and I didn't have the knowledge or the will to deal with the old one.  I put it in a thick plastic contractor's bag, taped it shut, and left it in the side yard.  The odor went away, and I was able to return to my denial.

Now the car is nearly complete.  It has over 2000 miles on it.  I get compliments wherever I go.  Everything is fine, right?

Well, my spouse hasn't forgotten about that nastiness in the side yard, and deep down I haven't either.  I've been putting off dealing with this unpleasantness.  I need to act to "clean up my past".  But how?
My city is pretty "green", and has a good reputation for dealing with household waste.  I call the city landfill, but they don't want the old gas tank because it has hazardous waste in it.  So I call the city hazardous waste disposal office.  They say that they will take the toxic sludge, but they can't take the tank.  They are sympathetic to the fact that it is caked on and extremely difficult to remove, but they can't take the tank.  Period.  They offer that perhaps a metal recycling place will take it, since the landfill won't.

Ok, I'll try to clean out the tank.  Let me be clear.  I really don't want to do this.  It's not going to be fun.  I've been avoiding it for a long time.  There are plenty of other things to do on the car that are much more fun!  But, I know that I need to.  I will submit, and be obedient to my conviction.

I start by removing the tank from the plastic bag, and cutting open the rusted top of the tank with tin snips.

 The 57 year old gasoline sludge is pretty amazing.  Probably the stinkiest stuff I have ever encountered.  A mix of the strongest rust smell you can imagine, sickeningly sweet stale gasoline,  with piquant motor oil overtones.  And this smell clings to everything!  Lacquer thinner smells like a rose in comparison.  Pictures do not do this justice! The stuff inside the tank is not really liquid... it's mostly syrup and chunky solids, about half and inch deep in the bottom of the tank.  There are some soft bits, but also some very hard dried rusted bits.  I use a hand scraper for about an hour, being very careful not to get any of this stuff on me.

I scoop out about half a gallon of the sludge, and realize that getting the rest out is really not possible.

OK, at least I tried.  The sludge can go to hazardous waste collection, along with my used motor oil and dried out paint.  I call the metal recycling place... they are open, and they say they will take the tank.  I put the tank on a layer of plastic and newspapers in the back of my wife's car, roll down all the windows, and drive to the recycling center.

Standing in line, the guy next to me says "that smells like an old car"!  Yup.  57 year old gasoline.  He jokes that it will only help fuel melting down the scrap steel... but I have my doubts.  I am amazed as the guy at the recycling center weighs the tank, prints me a receipt, and pays me $2.43.  I would be happy just to get rid of the thing, and he's giving me money!  He pays me with a $2 bill and change.  I haven't seen a $2 bill in over a decade! I take this as a blessing, God smiling on my work of redemption.

I keep the $2 as a token, and leave the .43 as a tip.  Yeah, I've never been a big tipper!  But somehow, this $2 seems special.  Something I should remember.

Even in the midst of my triumphs, I need to reassess my past.  What have I been neglecting?  Am I willing to have God reveal my denial?  Am I willing to do the work, even the unpleasant work, of turning over and recycling the residue I have left untouched in the side yard of my life?  I may not know how do do this, and I may need to ask for help.  I may look stupid and incompetent.  But, only I can make the choice to do this.  No one else can really do the work for me.

Step 10: Continued to take personal inventory, and when we were wrong, promptly admitted it.

There are times when sobriety is still difficult for me.  It's in those times, when doing the right thing gets hard, that I need a little encouragement.  Like a $2 bill.

Wind & Lace

windlace  

Web definitions (from Google)

(upholstery term) the fabric or leather covered, spongy piping or "wind hose" applied around doors to prevent drafts..

I like the word.  It sounds airy and somewhat fanciful.  Modern cars don't seem to have this interesting upholstery feature.  I'm not sure, but I think it's origin harkens back to a time when weatherstripping was either non-existant, or not very good, and the overlapping layer of  upholstery around the door frame was actually necessary to keep the wind out of the cabin.

While windlace was originally installed on the early t-birds, there has been some discussion about the overall aesthetic and utility of using it.  In Classic Thunderbird Club International (CTCI) concours judging, a car without windlace will loose points for authenticity... but not necessarily for workmanship.

I've been driving around without windlace for two months, and I have to say that I don't really miss it.  The weatherstripping is actually pretty good.  One thing windlace does, however, is hide any body color in the cabin when the door is closed.  It's not very expensive, so I figured I'd give it a try.  It needs to be installed at the front and rear of the door opening, prior to installing the kick panels and quarter panels.

With my non-stock color scheme, I needed to think through what color I should use.  I ended up with two windlace sets of different colors: turquoise and white.

The turquoise is the original interior color, but with my current seats and trim it doesn't match anything.  I decided to go with white.

Starting at the rear of the door frame, the windlace gets tacked into the tack strips.  I forgot to snap a shot of the driver side tack strip, so you are seeing the passenger side tack strip and driver side with the windlace installed.

 With the windlace installed, the quarter panel is screwed in right on top of it.

I like this look... it makes the area behind the seat look more finished.

The front windlace was a little less straightforward.  First, I had to remove the metal channel that holds the kick panel in place.  I had to bend 3 metal tabs, and the channel came off easily.

The windlace that came in the kit has a hard plastic rib sewn to the backside.  No instructions came with the kit, so I had to work out how to fit and clamp it with the metal tabs at the front of the door frame.  I decided not to use glue.  There was no evidence of glue there originally, and I was worried about gloops staining the windlace.

I re-did this three times before I was satisfied.  With the windlace finally in place, I could reinstall the metal channel, and bend the tabs to hold it in place.  The kick panel fits snugly in channel and the footwell, and doesn't need any additional glue or fasteners.

Looks pretty nice.   Here's the driver's side windlace installed.  I should really vacuum the carpet, huh?

 Today I also painted and installed a fiberboard panel between the trunk and the cabin, which should minimize the "trunk stink" in the car with the top on.  I also installed snaps under the rear garnish rail, so that the front of the tonneau could be folded in half and snapped in place, functioning as a drop curtain behind the seat.  Here's a shot behind the seat with the tonneau folded in the correct position.  Some day, maybe I'll get some vinyl the same color as the tonneau and glue it to the floor over the silver insulation... but I see no need to rush this.

It's been a good day.  I got a release from pressures at work, and worrying about Dad's upcoming care needs.  I can't ignore those things for long, but I'm grateful for a day to relax.

Next on the car I think I'll figure out a way to listen to some tunes without installing a "radio".  That should be fun.